Pain is almost to horrifying levels today. The only way I got by for those few days was with a constant ice pack. The reduction was placebo effect. 5.5g at 8am today. This makes me feel stupid for typing out all that shit for the last couple days. The optimism is hilarious to me right now. I guess it gave me a tolerance break. Still no idea on what the solution might be. 3g at noon. Pain so bad. Fully central. Almost crying. 5.5g at 3:00. Overall it’s been an absolute shit day. Instead of toughing it out for another day yesterday, I went in to do 3 hours of hard work and set myself back. I managed a short walk. Cooler outside, so that’s a help. 3 doses today. Fuck me. I bet tomorrow morning will be difficult. Let’s give it another try tomorrow. Every day I need to give this an effort. I need to keep evaluating whether this injection is doing anything. Pain felt better at night. Not central anymore. Had tons of energy and couldn’t sleep. Didn’t try going to sleep. 11:00 now and I’m somehow not tired. I had lots of yucky feeling from the kratom today. Too much of it. Maybe I can skip tomorrow. If I feel like I do now, yes, but it’s always different in the morning. Maybe at least I can sleep past 8 since I’m getting to bed late. I think it’s a serotonin thing, but it’s mild.

By Del