Half a Zanaflex at about 6. Woke up at 8. Felt pretty bad this morning. Took 5.5g at 9:00. I’m a bit gutted about it. Especially since I don’t really feel good. Back hurts. No pain relief. I was seeing an end to this shit and it’s pulling me back in. I’m thinking of buying more jarred red. The taper was going so well with that stuff. I don’t know if this is pain, or withdrawal symptoms, so dependency that is causing this. Why would changing batches fuck with me so much? This stuff is kind of just making me high without any pain relief or any other benefit. I do have the other batch of green that I was using when I started the taper. Maybe I’ll try that this afternoon. All this switching is only fucking me up and derailing the taper. I have no desire to go walking, or to even get off the couch. The red let me do that, all while tapering. I don’t get it. Right now I feel like I won’t be able to get off this stuff. I guess I’ll try the other batch in the afternoon. Maybe 5.5g? That keeps the taper moving. Then 5/5.5 tomorrow? Untreated pain is a disaster, and that’s basically what happened yesterday. That led to me feeling shitty today. But this kratom isn’t helping properly. Long walk. Went to Jewel. Man that grocery store sucks. I don’t think I’ll go back. 1:00. Feeling a bit beat. Not much energy. Pain is OK. I’m still thinking 5.5 for pm. Been on the couch a bit. Probably spend more time there. Hard drop off at 2. This doesn’t feel like a taper. It feels like normal usage. And the usage is set to rise right back up. Maybe I’ll try the second batch I got. If that doesn’t get me back on track, then I’ll get some jarred red. I don’t know. Internet out. Fuck. 5.5g of batch 125. The stuff I was using when the taper first began. 3:00. I went from tapering and feeling happy about it, feeling normal, feeling lower pain, to feeling panicked, painful, scared, feeling moderate WDs between doses. If this other batch doesn’t help, I’m off to the store. Again. 1.5g of the jarred red that I just bought. The green didn’t do anything. I’ll keep buying this as long as I keep tapering down. Amazing how much of a difference this makes. 1.5g and I feel normal again. I don’t understand this at all. Do I buy a bag of red from somewhere? Do I buy another 1 or 2 jars of this stuff from the store? It’s working, and that’s all that matters. I actually want to accelerate the schedule tomorrow. Or get it back on track. I’m not great right now, but that’s kind of how I feel. Unreal. Long walk, more games. I should be on 4.5/5 tomorrow on my old schedule. That’s a lot less than today. Right now I want to do it. Probably will be another story tomorrow. Long walk late in the evening. Felt good. I don’t understand any of this. It’s either 4.5 or 5 tomorrow morning. And I’m probably going to go to another shop to get more of this jarred red. The shop I went to has a new batch behind the one I bought. Maybe I can find the same batch somewhere else. What else but different batches to fuck me up?!