Woke up at 6:45. Half Zanaflex right away. Nothing. 6.5g Green Riau at 7:15. Slightly weaker than the Vietnam. The Vietnam treated me OK. This is fucking lovely. Just what I wanted. Going from the best few days in a while, to waking up at 6 and triple dosing and feeling fried from not sleeping all day. Nerve pain/spasm feeling. I don’t think I’ve gotten any relief from this injection. Only a flareup. Yeah, sitting here is ramping up the nerve pain really bad. Holy shit. 4.5g of red Vietnam. Middle dose doesn’t matter much, so I tried that. Actually feels decent. Middle dose normally only holds me over. 1:00 finally shower. 7.5g Riau at 3:30. Medium walk. I don’t feel a thing from the kratom. Maybe the walk fucked with it. Let’s see where tonight goes. Usually in the shitter. How the fuck to I break out of this cycle…? 30 minutes on the bike. Trying to generate my own energy. Piss and vinegar. Medium walk. Feeling good later. Serotonin surge. Lots of kratom today I guess. I probably can’t just keep getting serotonin surges, but this is the only thing that makes me feel human. I wish ADs did this. It makes sense that it burns out. But this cycle has to stop. I’d say I feel more serotonin than I do pain relief. Sometimes I feel relief. The ‘high’ that comes with it. This doesn’t feel like that.