Couldn’t get to sleep until after 1. Hard wake up at like 7 something. Managed to fall back to sleep and wake up at 9:15 thankfully. 5.5g at 10:10. I kind of wanted to take the day off, but I’m not going to suffer through that shit only to just ramp right back up. There is no point in hard quitting if the pain is going to come right back in a couple days. There is no way I can get by without the kratom. Only with other hard drugs, which I don’t want. Long walk. Did laundry. 1:30 and the pain is setting in. Today I’m wondering when the last time I’ve been truly lucid. I think I am a lot of the time, but I’m sure I’m really not. 6.5g at 3:30. Didn’t feel anything from it until dinner time. 45 minutes on the bike. I didn’t have the strength today. Could only manage medium intensity, but still got some time in. It’s really hurting the back to do it. Legs are rubber right now and back has nerve type pain. Long walk. Good energy at night. Snack happy. I’m feeling the need to go proper diet. Maybe with the small pieces of meat, but cut down on the salt, and up the vegetables. Try to get full v-word meals in there. Maybe 1 serving of meat a day max to start. Get rid of the sugar, frozen stuff. When the pain comes back though, I won’t want a salad. I’ll crave anything to make me feel different than horrible pain. Hard to throw it away, only to re-buy it. I can’t do it with all this shit in the house. I need to no buy new stuff. I’ve been doing well lately with diet and exercise. It got a bit fucked during the last flare up that lasted a week. I need to lose weight. It would be very helpful. Even through the flare ups, I’m still in better shape. I can carry that momentum through the shit days and pick it back up. Diet helps that a lot. I would have a very hard time making it through the first week of whole food plant based.