Up for an hour from 5. Normal med routine, wake up 9:00. So tired. I need sleep back on track. 6g at 10. Recovery day I think. 6.8 at 3:30. Went to Walmart and got 5HTP. Part of the science with the serotonin stuff. Mapped out a .2g drop per day taper. We’ll try this a different way. I don’t think it will matter. Feeling worse after dinner. Starting to get oppressive. I need a fucking break. I feel like today is tipping fast in the wrong direction. Started decent enough, but fuck. Filled out SNAP application. Again. Didn’t save the first time, of course. Might have fucked up some money info. I’ll have to fix that. Filled out most of SSD application. Also did internet assistance application. Need to go back for the SSD to finish. I am cross eyed right now. I am almost crying from pain from sitting here for all of 2 hours. Without a TV, I want my room back the way it was. I’m still in pain from that move. I’m expecting to wake up at 6 and that’s it. I’m tired of drugging myself to sleep every morning. I’m just going to say fuck it and triple dose. I just fucking can’t anymore.

By Del