I think 5 rums in the end. It made the night easier. It always has a price though. It causes nearly as many problems as it helps. Sleep was OK. Full zanny at 7. Wake up 9. 7g at 9:40. Wearing the brace now. I did a table session right before bed last night. I got a few pops. Overall it really hurt. Even with the rum in me. I’m kind of dreading getting on that thing today. I don’t have any fight in me. I need pain relief before I get some fight back in me. I can’t fight the 9s and 10s anymore. The shock is too severe. The effects of those high levels for such a long time is too severe and unmanageable. I can’t do it. 2 hours to go. Feeling panicky. The meds helped this morning. I cooked, I haven’t been nervous eating. In the recliner and not the couch. Watching cycling. Feeling the drop off now though. 8g at 3:30. Played some games. It hurts so fucking much to sit upright. Unreal. Cooking dinner while I am able. Short walk. I forgot to pump up the brace. It was OK. though. Still surviving. Better than yesterday. Not a good day by any stretch, but not super oppressive either. Decent table session at night. Some relief, but of course lots of pain in the lower area. Did a decently long time on it. Only 2 today, plus wearing the brace a lot.