So tired. I’m exhausted from exercise, and I’m lacking sleep. I said yesterday I was taking it easy, but I guess sitting at my desk for several hours and getting time on the bike really hurt. My spine hurts quite a bit right now. The dizziness I had yesterday went away in the evening. I’ll chalk that up to the first person video game. It’s never happened to me before, but I know first person games can cause motion sickness for some people. Put an ice pack on first thing. Trying to calm the spine pain. I won’t have a really meaningful recovery until I get my spine fixed. Head is foggy today. I’m hanging on to the couch for dear life. This is the return of the fibromyalgia. I can’t get more than 3 days in a row without it. It’s been threatening a comeback every day. Maybe I can use some of my positive momentum to push through. Depends on how long it lasts.

Magnesium foot bath and mag oil on the back got me upright. Knocked out a short walk. It was really difficult though. There’s only so much benefit I can get from the magnesium. The fibromyalgia is much stronger than a supplement. It’s so fucking relentless. Everything I’ve thrown at it ultimately fails. Things that have good results at first don’t last. I don’t know how to kill this disease. I don’t really even know how to treat the symptoms. I just get lucky sometimes, but never for long. The fibro is always there waiting to come back. I’ll keep trying. I need proper pain relief though. When I first got the inversion table, I felt pain relief, and that helped me out a ton. I haven’t had relief since then. Even now, I’m only getting fibromyalgia relief, not pain relief. 2:00 and I’m already tipping. That walk earlier was me coasting through the morning. It’s getting harder now.

Short walk after pm meds. That was really hard. I’m just desperately hoping I can somehow minimize this flare up and keep my momentum going. This shit totally takes the wind out of my sails and makes me want to stop trying. I could play video games all day instead of forcing all the exercise and I would probably be better off. If only I could even play games on days like this. I can’t sit at my desk.

I’ve been upright since my pm supplements. I think the pain has settled down, but my head is still pretty foggy. Maybe the pain is easing now and the fibro will ease by tomorrow morning? I’ve been trying to get myself to take it a little slower and easier when the exercise, but I get so excited by just being able to leave my house and end up doing too much. I’m pretty sure it was the exercise bike that pushed me over the edge yesterday. I put the stock saddle back on. It’s harder to get power with it, but easier on my ass. I’m so sick of this foggy feeling. It’s like a never ending hangover. Super painful.

By Del

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