Spine pain really ramped up hard last night. I don’t know exactly where that came from. It was a difficult day all around, but I wasn’t really expecting the spine pain to be that bad. I ended up on the futon on the floor for a while. I didn’t pass out, but I was super spaced out for a while. I used all the ice packs I had and that helped get me through the night. It helped keep the fibromyalgia at bay somewhat too. Sleep was messed up, as expected. I’m feeling burned out from all that. I’d say the spine pain is better this morning, but the day is young. I don’t know why it ramped up yesterday. It felt more like spine pain than fibro. It’s very weird how those 2 things work together. Each one flares up the other, but I don’t know what increases either one in order to start the loop.
Fibromyalgia has been hitting hard today. I was wondering if the spine pain was a little better, would that help the fibro flare ease. The answer, as always, is ‘no’. And now that the fibro is getting worse, the spine pain feels worse too. This freaking feedback loop. Once the fibromyalgia hits, you can’t make it go away or ease up. There is no ice pack like for the spine pain. I can ease the pain (temporarily) with something like an ice pack, but that won’t help the fibro. I’m stuck with it until it decides to ease up. Notice I don’t say “until it decides to go away”, or “leave”, or “stop”, because that never happens. The best I can hope for is for it to ease up.
I’ve been trying to distract myself by messing around on the computer. I haven’t been able to get off the couch at all. It’s after 4 and I haven’t eaten or showered. This is a very rough one. I guess this is my life for the next few days. This shit just never eases up or gives me anything. I got dehydrated today because I couldn’t get up to refill my water bottle. I’m at like a 9.5 today. Not quite enough to make me pass out unfortunately. I would welcome that right now. Please make this fucking madness stop. Somehow, anyhow. Please fucking help.