I think the fibromyalgia flare is ending. I sort of felt yesterday like it was ready to end, but I never know. It was fairly mild, so those don’t last as long. I feel burned out from it, which is normal. Hopefully today gets better as it goes. I always need recovery days just to get over it and get past being burnt. Yesterday started out better, but then started dipping by noon. Today could do that too, but I’m more optimistic about today.
Feeling better in the afternoon. The morning had a super slow start, and I didn’t have any confidence, but it’s turning out like I predicted. The fibro flare is over, and today is a recovery day. Not a great day, but a decent one. I don’t have much energy. That’s the burned out feeling I get, and the recovery day will help that out as long as there isn’t another flare up right around the corner. I feel like a 200 pound weight has been lifted off my chest right now. It’s unreal how simply the absence of fibromyalgia can make me feel much more normal. I don’t feel great, and I’m still fucked from terrible spine pain, but it’s one less thing I have to deal with.
Got out for a walk. They are repairing sidewalks in the neighborhood. Just short little sections that have buckled. There is no disabled access. There never is here. They leave construction sites open for months here, and they never have any kind of disabled access. I either have to walk in the street, or on somebody’s lawn. I chose the street since I can at least see where I’m walking. If I step on a sprinkler head, or plant my can in some low spot that I can’t see, that would be super painful for me. I can’t risk falling or even stumbling badly. Fucking WonderBreadLand™. I call it WonderBreadLand™ because it is completely devoid of any kind of diversity or culture. Just chain restaurants , big box stores, and white people worrying that their food might be spicy, and they can’t have that, even though they’ve never tried it before. And they never think about disabled people. They won’t stop for you when you cross the street. An old man trying to cross a street, in a crosswalk, with a cane, and at most they will swerve around you. I’ve had cars beep at me for trying to cross in a crosswalk. They seriously need some education on how to treat people here.
I did a short walk this evening. Much better weather today. The walking was a little easier today. For the last few days with that flare up, it has been almost impossible to do anything physical. It zaps my energy. My body is in pain everywhere. Movement of any kind is just so painful. Every part of my body feels like it’s the first time I’ve ever moved. Life is a lot easier without fibromyalgia. It’s not easy, just easier. Once the fibro eases up, then I’m left with pure, insane levels of spine pain, but I’ll take that over both pain and fibromyalgia any day.