Woke up at like 8:30. I was trying to remember how well I slept and I don’t really remember! That’s usually good. I felt crappy though when I woke up. Had some Dr. Pepper and ice pack. I felt better after both of those. Serotonin started up. Sailed through 10:00, but started feeling withdrawals shortly after. It’s definitely harder to quit when you have a half day the day before. WDs start so early in the morning and make for a harder day. I was going to take ash/ag, but skipped it because it seems to make withdrawals worse. I’ll start that maybe later today or tomorrow. Maybe load up later in the day to precipitate over night? Depends on how it all goes anyway. Feeling a bit sweaty already. Temperature issues. I guess it’s good that I’m well into withdrawals and I feel OK. Hottest day of the year today, so no going outside. I wouldn’t mind some long walks. Loads of nervous energy right now. No depression. Not much anxiety right now. I need to keep up the serotonin flow somehow. This process would be cake with a flood of serotonin. But anything that provides that will extend the withdrawal process like last time. Keep the sweating going. I might be right on time if this works out heading toward cooler weather. That would make walks easier and could help the sweating. I need to distract myself somehow today to get through this and keep the serotonin going. No idea how on such a stupid hot day. Little runny nose already too. 12:30 and the pain is holding out OK. Going to friend’s tomorrow to help with something. That’s good. I kind of need it right now. Withdrawals are like medium. Probably as strong as they normally get in the day time. They get worse overnight. If I didn’t have a half day yesterday, I would be at this place at like 4:30 instead. I have icy hot and the brace right now. Tried playing TAB and got bored. WDs are very distracting. That’s one reason walks are nice right now. Sucks I had to get the hottest day of the year to deal with this. That’s usually the case. When I had that really good week, it was in the 90s. Less humid at least. Always brutal for me. Always. This will wear on me as the day goes on. I regret drinking that caffeine! I didn’t even think about it. I would love a 2 hour nap right now. Without being able to go outside for walks, I think beers become inevitable. I can’t go too hard because I have to help CJB at 11! Don’t be dumb! I don’t think the WDs are getting worse, but they are wearing on me. Only 2:00. Outside walks would help. I’m really tired and would love to sleep. Maybe Zanaflex myself. A nice reset would help. Of course the day can’t end soon enough! Probably insomnia tonight. When will the depression and anxiety hit? 1g each ash/ag at 2:40. Feeling the need for some sort of boost. Hopefully it doesn’t make it worse. Maybe it will today, but it would be better tomorrow for it. Beer time isn’t too far away, so I went for it. Going to try some games. Feeling cold most of the day. AC on 74. I remember the first quit saying the first day was the ‘easiest’. WDs didn’t hit until later in the day. It was a tough few hours in the evening and I still slept OK. Day 2 onward were harder. Stronger withdrawals and the insomnia started on night 2 I think. I can’t remember when those strong withdrawals were at night. 2,3,4? 2nd quit says day 3 was the hardest. I think that one started with a half day before, but I was taking everything under the sun then. I’m not suffering from pain. Only from WDs and it’s not all that bad. Unpleasant, yes, but I have enough serotonin in my brain right now to get through. Still many hours to go today. I remember lots of mental issues through the quit previously. I might try to treat that. No idea. I’m able to smile right now. Feeling OK. It’s more annoying than anything. Had a poop a bit ago. Feeling warmer. That tracks from before, just a half day sooner. I guess if I don’t take any other drugs, I should be finished a half day earlier, but that probably doesn’t work that way anyway. Not like on day 5 at 4:00 I suddenly feel like I’m done. Maybe day 5 is easier in general. The last several times I stopped kratom, I went right back on it, so no point in speculating on day 5. This pain could come back any second and fuck it all up. The only reason I’m doing this well is because the pain is good. I feel withdrawals stronger than the pain atm. That’s a very good thing. Beers are coming soon since this is just annoying me and I’m stuck inside. First beer 6:20. Pain is creeping up a bit. Mostly just tired and tired of the mild WDs. It’ really not that bad, but it’s on my nerves. 8:00. 3 beers. I feel knackered. Did a church walk. Holy fuck is it humid. Can’t wait for that to ease up. Tomorrow is supposed to be cooler. Don’t know about humidity. That might help if I can get out for walks. I’m beat. Very tired. I hope I sleep tonight. I’ll throw GABA and Zanaflex at it for sure. I don’t want any more beers. Not as wasted as I was with the gabapentin, but not far off. 4 beers in the end. Played TAB and beat a map I failed at 6 times. Pain is pretty bad. I’m worried about tomorrow. I feel it everywhere. I was playing with the ice pack on. Maybe too much time? I spent a lot of the day on the couch. Just have to wait to see what tomorrow brings. We’ll give it a go, but I don’t know right now.

By Del